Roommate brought friends over today, turns out I was not as brave as I had thought, did not venture out. They were as annoying as always, they were watching Community, they watch a lot of shows that I like, I wish I could read his mind, the first time he did this did he expect me to impose myself? or did he really just not want me involved? Still hate him, fantasied about killing them all and disposing of the bodies for a while.
Mother called me while they were around, I ignored the first call to end the sound of the vibrations and the second call I answered and put it down after 90 seconds, had to speak in a whisper because they would hear me otherwise, still kept the chatter to a minimum though, brushed her off, said I was busy, some other unpleasant things, acted very disinterested, looking back I was too cruel, I will call her back tomorrow if I get the chance. I blame her for a lot of my problems but she does care, she was just an incompetent mother.
Had to go out to get milk, was a little warm, started sweating, I hate that. Bumped into a man on my way there, he said “hello”, I did not look at him, raised me hand and said “hi” while standing less than a metre from him. It was an uncomfortable experience, was self concious because I had masturbated but not showered and was wearing unclean clothes.
Struggling with tutorial work, just memorising the examples. It takes hours with my breaks.
Distracting myself with YGOpro more and more.