Another off day

Watched some anime, thought it was shit, annoyed me to learn many other people like that particular show. They claimed I was a troll, derailed the thread, making them mad was unintended but a fine substitute for actual discussion. People did eventually give proper responses but I was not able to argue very well, I think I might have just been wrong or my inability to converse well extends to not being able to argue, other evidence of this is my academic work.

Tried reading some gambling manga, struggled to get drawn into it.

Roommates talked to each other in the kitchen a few times. Female is a bitch. Maybe. The two time I was around her with out other roommate (When I moved in and when I made an effort with the Xmas party), she seemed to make an effort, I did not give her much, maybe her bitchiness is just a response to my coldness. But my last roommate was almost always chipper and friendly, but she was a lying deceitful two faced cow.  It is impossible to understand people. I would still fucking kill to be back there with her though, literally, living with her was the highlight of my existence, I would love another chance, I know that’s not possible and the chances of ever being in a similar situation are slim so those memories of missed opportunities do nothing but haunt me. I try to ignore the fact that I would just mess it up all over again, I can’t even use my imagination to visualise a scenario where things works out well, it’s just so far fetched, I really would settle for the same setup as before but keeping her a permanent fixture in my life.

Male roommate brought his gf over again, late in the day so not so bad but my dad called me and I rejected the call since I didn’t want anyone to hear me talking. Will call him tomorrow, it is always the same 1 minute long conversation asking me how I am. I do not really like the guy, I don’t get him and he doesn’t get me.


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