I can see the ending now

Sweated heavily during night time, the end of my DNP cycle, had to get up to refill my water bottle more than once. Still felt fatigued throughout the following day. Weighed 144.25lbs, not bad if I lose some more once I drop the water weight though I ate quite a bit today so think I might put some back on.

Midday I was in the kitchen eating tuna and sweetcorn from a bowl, my father entered and starting going on at me again to have a hair cut, I tried to keep my cool but he kept pecking at me head, I got mad and had to express myself so I threw the bowl against the floor, smashing it, I then left for my room. A short while later my father entered my room and hurled abuse at me, the same shit as usual, that I look bad, that people laugh when they see me, that I cause him embarrassment. Some other shit in paki that I couldn’t understand but regardless made me uncomfortable. He really couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t obey him and have a haircut, I tried explaining basic logic and values to him, that it’s my hair, I don’t tell him how to keep his hair and that I don’t care what other people think of my appearance as long as I’m happy with how I look.

Daddy then moved onto other topics like me not having a job, everyone else apparently does, topics like I should leave the house more and “go into town”, I asked what I would do in town, he said that I should meet friends, I told him that I don’t have any friends, I never had friends, why does he only care about my social life now? He hypothesised that I don’t have any friends because I “smell” and that people don’t want to sit next to me in class, that’s how childish this paki is. The paki also thinks that my appearance will make any difference to whether or not the uni will have me back, moronic paki and his moronic values. I put my headphones on and watched WWE Raw, he stood and started at me for a long time before eventually leaving.

Mum wondered around outside my door for a while during his tirade, it’s too late for her to have an issue with his abuse now, she should have left him or reported him to the police at some point in the last 25 years.

I planned on leaving here a year ago but it’s not easy to rent a place as a NEET, landlords have too many options, too much interest. I intended to find a job first but that’s not happening, I’m trapped.

A guy on /r9k/ made a little text adventure based on my tale, it’s actually kinda funny. https://gitlab.com/ASCVGH/TheLegendOfPoleaboo/

Got good at Hearthstone again, win streaks with Discard Warlock and Midrange Shaman, went from rank 13 to rank 7, got ended by a Rogue of all things.

Went to ASDA for mum, she left money on the table for me to buy the stuff, felt like a child, used my own money, the walk to the store and back was difficult due to the DNP fatigue. Kiddies leaving sixth form scattering around, saw some strong facial hair on the paki males, made me feel less regret over not transitioning earlier. The paki students who were loitering were quite noisy.

Don’t know why the laser clinic isn’t responding, I’ll test the waters by contacting them with another account.

Going to sleep early as I need to get the train at 6.30am tomorrow.


5 thoughts on “I can see the ending now

  1. You should make a sex tape where you suck a BBC and then let your dad watch it and send it to all his dirty paki friends. Would be p humiliating for him.


  2. If the academic hearing goes OK, will you re-enrol in Uni next year? Would you return to Aberdeen or transfer credits somewhere local?


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