Last night I lay down at 8pm, woke up at 3am and couldn’t get back to sleep. Work went by fine, it has really calmed my nerves although I screwed up again, can plead ignorance this time, so not the end of the world. Another bright point is that I have been able to bury my previous mistake to dome extent. I failed my quality assessment again, I’m up to 80% now, still making the same error and that’s a cause for concern.
I can’t explain it but my feelings when I see the not-tranny are so toxic, strong and negative, it causes me extreme emotional distress. The obsession is there again, I’m noticing her arriving 40 minutes early to her shift and trying to listen in on what she’s saying/doing, I felt something when I left notes on the same accounts as her, I don’t know how to fix myself. I can’t stress how strong these feelings are and how bad they make me feel.
I’m on the table with two guys, Man City fan and DnD guy, the others have found free computers among the general populous, feel bad for those stuck with me as I still can’t commuicate with them and I feel bitter towards those who have “ascended”.
Managed to stick to my diet today.
The Indians fucked up already, that’s what happens when you hire monkeys.