Cow

Today at work, the trans/lesbian sat opposite me, she was just sitting in her usual seat, it wasn’t a decision, really. I felt like she was staring at me in a suspicious way and again later in the day, I don’t know what her problem is. After an hour she moved desks to sit with her friends, I felt insulted, obviously. Need to get a handle on my emotions. She wore that top I also have, I’m going to wear it to work one day, it’s not OK that she can dictate what I can and can’t wear. Fucked up plenty at work, call time doesn’t mean anything when I’m screwing up so often. There’s this other guy at work who I also felt was staring at me in a mocking way, it makes me suspicious. That guy walked in on me in the stairwell when I was calling the GP, got an appointment 3 weeks from now.

It’s possible I was being mocked due to the state of my hair. Didn’t realise until I got home.

Thinking of buying some WWE tickets but they’re over £100 for good seats, I want to attend a live event because it seems like normie behaviour and something different to spend money on.

I stopped taking Sertaline a while ago, I’m up and down so don’t feel like taking the pills every day.

My shins hurt.

Only had a banana for lunch as we were out of yoghurts, ate spaghetti bolognase at home though.

Hearthstone isn’t ready to be updated on my Amazon tablet so I may miss out on a reward.

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15 thoughts on “Cow

      • I know that’s your perception, but think about it logically. Why would any of these people give the slightest shit about you? They are all just there for the same reason as you, to try and make a bit of money.

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      • That’s not true, they’re not like me and they all know it, I’m not social so I don’t enjoy my time there because unlike the others I don’t take breaks to joke with friends and also unlike others I’m not a student, this isn’t a bit of cash on the side to me, it’s a real job, actually it’s not even that since I don’t need money, I work for a sense of purpose in life

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      • They broke into his house, saw he had a certain type of shirt and then bought an identical shirt and one of them wore it so they can “dictate what he can and can’t wear” to work. They’re obviously out to get him.

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      • Actually she had the shirt first and I liked it and bought the same one but I’m pretty sure it’s a guys shirt so I have more right to wear it than her

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      • You do need the money. Changing your gender is enormously expensive.

        Or don’t you want that anymore?

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      • Oh ok, so you’re getting mad that she had a shirt that you liked and you bought one and then she wore it again and you got upset because who is she to do that.

        Go get sectioned you looney fuck, you’re completely cracking up.

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  1. Do you think the clothes you wear (tshirt, colour of hoody etc) define you? You react so agressively when someone wears clothes you have/want, like they’re trying to steal your identity. Having turned your back on your genetic inheritance (ethnicity and gender) you think wearing pink sneakers and an MLP hoodie will reconstruct yourself as a different person? I guess this explains why you were driven to the point of suicide after your recent haircut disaster. It wasn’t just a fashion crisis – it was a loss of your individuality!!

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    • The stuff you write hits hard and I think it correct because it sounds so smart.

      Maybe you’re right but what can I do about that? I never cared about the clothes or hair I had until recently, I thought this was evolution

      Are you a former psych student?

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      • you’ve always cared so much about what other people think about you. At same point your decided your current personality was beyond salvation and refocused you efforts on building a new ‘personality’, but it’s based around superficial identifiers – fashion, gender identification, body aesthetics etc. In my opinion your current efforts are destined to fail because the root cause of your problem remains – you base your opinion of self on your opinion of other people’s opinion of you. Solution: accept yourself Poley. Love yourself unconditionally. If the world has a different opinion – FUCK EM!

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      • Interesting but accepting myself isn’t easy and even then that wouldn’t necessarily make me happy.

        I also feel like it would be wrong to accept myself since it would be delusional since I objectively suck

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  2. “I’m pretty sure it’s a guys shirt so I have more right to wear it than her” please say this is a joke. if not, then this means you’ve chemically castrated yourself and fucked up your body, transitioning without even the most basic handle on trans* or gender theory. you haven’t thought this through at all.

    Like

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