Bored

Woke up earlier than usual, around half past 9 and I remembered one of the reasons I hate being one so much. The time crawls to a stop, the day feels even slower than when I’m all alone up in Aberdeen. Probably because in the house I’m either around other people or can hear them so aware of their presence, it’s stressful, I want peace and quiet 90% of the time.

Talked with my brother a little, he’s back from uni, we have the same interests, it’s easy to speak with him. Didn’t see my dad much and probably won’t until I leave, he’s out of the house unless he’s sleeping. My mother is still upbeat, no talk of the circumstances leading to my arrest initiated by her. Cousins visited, they always llived within walking distance, known them all my life, we are similar people in terms of philosophies. They didn’t know I had been suspended from uni and the rest of it, I brought it up when they asked me a question I couldn’t answer otherwise without lying. Took it the same as the rest, thought I was being unfairly treated/persecuted and the McDonalds thing was nothing more than silly on my part. Everyone has been happy to to see me, talk to me, ask me questions, feels good most of the time.

Had a spirited conversation about what to do with refugees with one of my cousins, she’s 16, seemed very passionate about it but despite wanting the country to accept more refugees, doing more to help them, she was also for ejecting welfare scamming Pakis from their homes to house the more needy. Political opinions are more diverse and complex than I thought.

Got a call, the amusement park wanted me for a trial next week, I’m going to be a “ride operator”. Feels satisfying. Heard there are jobs going around here at a call centre too, they’re mass hiring right now. Going home on the 27th.

The main benefit of being home is that I’m not constantly on edge. Watching a bit of TV, not done that in a long time, it’s terrible, nice background noise though.

Walked through the neighborhood, lot more white people about. Used to know to stick to their side of town.

Pretty sure I know how my story is ending, or at least I thought I did, I can’t bring it up to my parents, don’t want to imagine what everyone would think and feel. I’d really have to be  against it, close to getting a job so those thoughts will be kept at bay for now.